on purpose

I’ve been staring at the screen for awhile now. Looking over a running list of things that I want to write about here on my blog. Some days, I know exactly what I want to write and my ideas and opinions can’t get from my head on to the screen fast enough. It doesn’t help that I am a remedial typer at best.

But today is not one of those days. Today is the day where I stare and stare and eventually give myself an ultimatum. Pick something and get started or….or what? It’s hard to be your own enforcer. And then I do. I switch from Evernote where I keep all my lists organized over to WordPress where my blog lives, and I hit the button: Add New Post.

I leave the title blank because I’m still not sure where this is going.

Then I change my mind and go back and fill in the title field: purpose.

A topic so big and wide and deep I could find myself floating around forever.

And this is how I arrive here. Thinking about purpose. The purpose of this post. The purpose of the blog. My purpose in this time and place. My purpose in this world.

I do believe that everyone has a purpose. It took me well over 35 years to lock into mine. And even now, it’s more of a feeling than a set of words describing a plan. Or a to-do list or a job or a path.

That’s where our purpose can elude us. We get confused between what we love and what we want to do and how we want to live and finding a job that brings all of those things together. Your purpose comes before that. It’s entirely unique to you. It’s your gift that you were meant to share. It’s the tiny seed inside your heart that speaks only to you.

Without your purpose, you can’t make plans. Not anything that will stick.

And it doesn’t change. Your plans might change. Your dreams and goals might change. But your purpose is locked in. Hardwired. 

I carry a little jealousy towards people that have always felt their purpose. I feel late to the game like I’m playing catch up.

I finally arrived at my purpose through an extensive inventory of where I’ve been and the choices I’ve made. And when I look back, I see that there were many signs along the way that I resisted. Or chose not to see or acknowledge. It’s a good thing that your purpose is persistent. It doesn’t let you off the hook as far as I can tell.

Once you connect to your purpose, there’s no turning back. Once you find the words to tell yourself, I am here because… you’ll have a built-in compass. And then, you can start down the path. You can start making plans.

You’re probably thinking, Kaly, this is all very vague. Can you at least give us a little detail? Maybe a little direction?

Okay, here are three things that helped me uncover my purpose:

1. Patterns – In my life when I’ve felt the most genuine and in my element when I was true to me and not the expectations of others, in those moments, there are patterns. In most of those moments I felt a need and a freedom to express myself through words on a page. I was able to use words to tell a story, connect to myself and those around me.

2. Gravity – There are also things that I am drawn to. No matter how hard I try to go in another direction, I find myself pulled back to a certain set of experiences. Some of these things include voracious reading, learning new ways of seeing, and an affinity for the stories and experiences that connect us all.

3. Spirit – Knowing and accepting who I am and how I operate has given me more insight into my purpose. Letting myself be an introvert when I need to be and pushing myself to take risks and be more vulnerable has allowed me to understand and know myself better. The closer you get to yourself, the easier it is to see clearly where your purpose lies.

I found my purpose connecting people through the telling and sharing of stories.

It’s simple. And somewhat vague but it’s the underlying thread of who I am. And there are a million different ways that it plays out in my life.

But really, the details of my purpose don’t matter. Because it’s mine.

Have you found yours?

I’ll leave you with this idea. What if this is what we taught in schools? How we parented and guided our children? If we built their lives around leading them to their purpose? Wouldn’t that be something?