It happens every year. The Holidays.
Deep breath.
This is a little insight that I picked up in yoga recently that I thought might come in handy for this time of year. This time of year that we want so badly to be joyful but find ourselves being pulled in a million different directions. So as we head into the holidays…
Are you operating on a surplus or a deficit?
When I’m operating from a deficit, it’s all about more, more, more. I want more. I need more. Time, money, love, happiness, respect, cardigans, cookies, wine. I could go on and on. There’s never enough, and so I never feel satiated.
During the holidays this translates into binge eating toffee and compulsive shopping and snapping at my kids and taking on craft projects that I’ll never finish and staying up until midnight making holiday cards and buying crap out of the dollar bin at Target. We need more presents. More decorations. More food. More traditions. More specialty cocktails. More glitter. More. More. More.
When I’m operating from a surplus, there’s too much. I’m overwhelmed. There’s so much that I can’t appreciate anything. I’m just going through the motions. Checking things off the list. And it just keeps coming.
During the holidays this looks like buying gifts to simply fill an obligation and eating at Taco Bell because I need to eat now and moving from task to task only to find for every one I eliminate it sprouts four more and physically dreading the sound of Christmas music and audibly sighing in lines and walking out of my way to avoid the Salvation Army bell and making three kinds of stuffing because I’ve always made three kinds of stuffing and eternally thinking about the LIST and just wanting it to be done and over.
Somewhere in here is the center. The place of balance.
Because if I’m operating on either extreme, I’m totally disconnected from the true experience.
So this is the first of a few holiday challenges I’m issuing for myself.
Find the center of this holiday season.
Don’t go crazy. Don’t let it make me crazy.
Make every effort to stay connected to the joy and the love.
It doesn’t require more. It doesn’t require less. It requires a conscious effort to find the balance.
PS You might have noticed that I’m playing around with illustrating a few posts here and there. I find it more fun than dealing with photography which totally stresses me out. And I enjoy making myself look like a 12 year old girl.
Love the drawings! I hope I will find the balance….
Thank you Valerie! I hope that you’re able to find some balance. Or at least be able to pull yourself in when things start to get out of control – that’s half the battle!
KAles, I struggle with this every year! I promise to stay level thus year. I may have to come back and read this a few more times.
I know…it’s a constant push and pull. We’re really making every effort to be a little more in tune this year.
I find the key to the holidays is managing expectations. I think a lot of the stress comes from worrying about other people’s expectations of you during this time. Do they expect Christmas cards? Am I supposed to get presents for this person or that person? Are these family members expecting me to visit?
If people have material or economic or time expectations of you that are not possible, that’s their problem, not yours. Do what you want and what you can, the rest is stress.
1. I do expect you to visit. 2. Can I read this back to you when you have children? Pretty please? 3. You are exactly right. That’s why I’m so into this centered thing and focusing on what we want to do and not what we feel like we should do because we’ve always done it. Stress free baby. That’s the goal.
Love the drawing!
Thank you!!!!