three things about boys

There are some universal truths. Gravity. It won’t heal if you pick at it. The first cup of coffee and the first glass of wine always taste the best. You can try to fight them. Push against them. But it doesn’t really get you anywhere. Right now, I am living in the world of boys. This summer I’m spending all day every day with a six year old boy and a seven year old boy. We’ve lived in our new home almost two weeks, and we’ve already met at least nine boys in the six to ten age range on our block alone. I’m out numbered. I see a lot of antics.

And my life has been a lot more pleasant since I’ve decided to accept the following three things:

1) They can not keep their hands off each other.  Keep your hands to yourself. Stop touching each other. Get your hands off him. These have been the most popular refrains in my household for as long as I can remember. And I’m tired of it. It’s like telling them to stop breathing. It’s just not going to happen. So I’m choosing the path of least resistance. I’m going to let them tussle like lion cubs. I’m going to send them outside and cheer them on. And when it gets a little rough and someone pushes it too far and tears start to flow, I’m not going to say, “I told you not to touch him!” I’m going to ignore it, and go back to finding summer inspiration on Pinterest. You just can’t keep boys from touching each other, but you can calmly point out that eventually someone always gets hurt and let them figure it out. Case closed.

2) They are going to mess/move around. This is a little different than #1 because it doesn’t always involve another boy.  It goes something like this – they can’t walk in a straight line down a sidewalk. The can’t stop themselves from sprinting across a very tiny house. They can’t resist a stick. Or a ball (see #3) or a rubber band. Or a puddle. Or a string. Or a chain. If there’s a manipulative, they’ll find it and most likely turn it into a weapon. If there’s a railing, they’ll hang on it. If there’s a stone wall, they’ll walk it like a balance beam. Their minds and their bodies demand motion. And noise. The new thing in my house is yelling as loud as possible for no reason. My son Cameron took on the following habit during dinner – stand up, sit down, stand up, sit down, stand up, sit down. Until recently I would drive myself bonkers telling him to sit down at the table. But then I adopted the old faithful “He’s not going to go to college standing at the dinner table!” and let it go. He promptly stopped the up-down routine when the nagging subsided….interesting.

3)  They love tennis balls.  It bounces. But not too much. It can be hit with a bat or a stick. It can fit in your pocket. You can toss it to another person or throw it against a wall. You can get hit with it, and it doesn’t hurt. You can take it in the water. You can lose it, and it’s no big deal. You can find one, and it can make your day. It’s yellow – a color easy to spot in most conditions – except for when it fades to a pea soup green. The perfect gift for a boy of any age is a sleeve of tennis balls. My mother-in-law has been bringing them to our house for years, and it took me this long to catch on to the phenomenon. A tennis ball can diffuse almost any situation. Name another ball with its power and portability. Now that I’ve come to understand this, I’m keeping one in my bag at all times.

And so we continue the dance of summer – having downtime while staying entertained.  Treating ourselves while not going overboard.  And letting the boys be boys. I wasn’t joking about Pinterest, you can check out my SUMMER board here.